Thoughts on Google Alerts and Breaking the Cycle of Suffering

scapegoat quote | Dianna Bonny Photography

I discovered sometime ago that members of my husband’s family have a Google Alert on my name. I assume it is how they discovered and subsequently sabotaged the webinar I wrote about last week. I have to admit it is rather unsettling and eerie to think that they are watching my every Internet move.

I use the Google Alert feature to keep up on topical subjects that help me write the blog so I can stay abreast of what is happening in the world of healing. It is a useful feature for collecting data and information that otherwise might take hours to find.

To have an alert on someone personally, for the sole purpose of surveillance and sabotage, is an entirely different matter, particularly in the aftermath of a tragedy, where there is a blatant unwillingness to face the truth and move on.

In an odd way, this situation beautifully illustrates the heart of my message: that healing is a choice that requires a devoted personal intention, as well as a determined mindset to curate the contents of our lives in a way that will support our best life, and the lives of those around us.

Just as necessary: consciously placing our awareness into practices that will move us out of pain and suffering, and toward freedom and healing.

Unfortunately, the Google Alert on my name is a perfect example of how people become stuck in their pain and addicted to perpetuating the cycle of suffering. Being a victim is intoxicating, and sadly, it can be a powerful platform from which to build a hate-filled existence.

It reminds me of the women I meet who say they wish their husband’s would do what mine did so they could be happy, desperately clinging to the familiarity of their pain, instead of taking action on a decision to create a better life for themselves.

I do not say this lightly, because I understand how scary it is to make these choices, but make them we must, or we imprison ourselves to a life dictated by dark forces.

Sadly, the aftermath of suicide is universally saturated in blame. I know this because I read it on the message boards of support groups and hear it from the people I meet whose lives have been altered by suicide. Having lived it for four years, it has given me the clarity to understand that we can never heal when every ounce of our energy is invested in pointing the finger at someone else for our problems.

Healing begins in surrendering to what is and engaging with it honestly. It is not easy or simple and it is not without pain. In this, our emotional body is a mirror image to our physical body. The road to recovery from a physical injury can be a long and arduous one, requiring a high level of mental and physical discipline and commitment. Ask any athlete.

For the sake of our children and humanity, our emotional wounds deserve the same care and attention.

Are you stuck in an unhealthy cycle of pointing the finger? What would it feel like to be relieved of that burden and move into the next best version of you?

Hoping you find the love, truth and wisdom you need on your healing journey.


Who is Dianna Bonny?

Hi, my name is Dianna Bonny. It’s my mission to candidly share my journey with you. For me, it’s all about the healing: to create a radiant healing energy for others who have befallen a similar fate. Together, we can forge beautiful lives of belonging and connection. Thanks for joining me today! I look forward to hearing from you.

  3 comments for “Thoughts on Google Alerts and Breaking the Cycle of Suffering

  1. August 8, 2014 at 12:52 pm

    I’m sorry to hear that you are dealing with this behavior from your ex-husband’s family. It is easier for people to blame than to accept things they don’t like without making anyone wrong. Accepting that this world is full of both tragedy and beauty, and that that’s okay, takes a level of maturity many people lack. Thankfully for you it sounds like you’re dealing with their limitations by drawing upon your strengths.

    • Dianna Bonny
      August 8, 2014 at 1:57 pm

      Bless you Indigo! I really appreciate your comments. The world is indeed full of tragedy beauty – well said. I consider them teachers who are presenting many deep lessons to learn. Thank you, xo

  2. August 9, 2014 at 10:04 pm

    To be monitored on google alert by your ex-husband’s family sounds strange but like Dianna said it’s easy for people to blame than accept reality. I am glad that despite the situation , you taking time to be strong. Bless you.

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