I grew up in the era of, “Sticks and stone will break your bones, but words will never hurt you.” Clearly, whoever originated this saying had never dealt with social media, cyber-harassment or an unmonitored teenager armed with a Smartphone. My how times have changed. Words are powerful weapons and yes, it’s true, your words and actions do matter.

I thought of this when I read this past week that Dr. Fredric Brandt, a prominent celebrity dermatologist, had taken his life.The details are still settling, but it would seem that he was struggling emotionally and then further upset by a TV show that depicted him in a less than flattering manner. I’m not suggesting the show was the cause of his choice, merely reflecting on the tragedy of his death. 

It is reported that we have close to one million people a year taking their lives on the planet and I often find myself wondering why. I think about it because of my own experience and, more importantly, because I am the mother of three nearly-adult children. I was hoping they would inherit a planet glued together by love, but lately, life on Earth seems more and more unglued than ever, seemingly confirmed by the alarming rise in suicide deaths. 

I have come to the conclusion that the suicide epidemic is asking us some very deep questions about the way we are connecting with ourselves, and each other. Isn’t it possible that it is pressing our noses to the window of our existence and begging us to examine the way we are living and treating one another?

To interpret the epidemic in this way may seem crazy, but when you go through the experience of suicide loss, the world is never the same. Every single thing is held up for questioning and meaning can come from the strangest of places.

Surely, one million humans dying reflects a socially significant issue that should be openly embraced with compassion and discussed, not in terms of data, but as the soul-wrenching, painful experience it is, on all fronts.

Sadly, it is still rather quiet out there.

I have written before about my experience with being cyber-harassed. There were times when I felt overwhelmed and really didn’t know how to deal with the cruelty. I told myself it didn’t matter. Other people told me to rise above and consider the source. But the truth is, I’m human and it hurt. It touched the wounded part of me, the part we all share deep down, including Dr. Brandt.

This is the trouble with the culture we now inhabit, where people feel entitled to make fun of others. The targets are real people, with real pain. And, the frightening truth is, one never really knows exactly how fragile another human might be or where they are on the pain scale.

Holding people who are causing harm up for public scrutiny and examination is one thing. Blatant unkindness, quite another.

We humans are incredibly resilient, yes, but we are undeniably fragile as well.

It is the disregard for fragility that troubles me, and something I hope people will hold close to their hearts during their comings and goings. This, and perhaps the re-introduction of common sense and integrity into the unraveling social fabric of our lives.

I’d love to hear your thoughts are on how we are connecting, or not, with those around us. Are we leaving our children a world glued together with love, or are we losing ground with regard to social connection?

May your journey always be blessed and protected from cruelty.

Sending love,

–db

Who is Dianna Bonny?

Hi, my name is Dianna Bonny. It’s my mission to candidly share my journey with you. For me, it’s all about the healing: to create a radiant healing energy for others who have befallen a similar fate. Together, we can forge beautiful lives of belonging and connection. Thanks for joining me today! I look forward to hearing from you.