Unfortunate Encounters with Angry People

 

Anais Nin quote photo | Dianna Bonny PhotographyLast week was my daughter’s twenty-first birthday. She made the observation that it was the last milestone of her youth, so I replied that now she had years like thirty, forty and fifty to look forward to. She mumbled something about not wanting to get old, which made me laugh because it is exactly what I thought when I was her age. I wouldn’t go back for anything in the world though, because I am enjoying the hard won wisdom of knowing myself, and living from that space after all these years of being only a partial version of me.

She is in the process of moving, so we shuttled some boxes over to her new apartment before going to her birthday lunch. Her new pad is located on an awkward alleyway and the only place to park and unload was in front of a few garages. Since we were literally going up and down the stairs in tandem, the car was never unattended for more than a minute. The decision to park here was a big mistake.

I had just set a box down and turned to go back out to the car when a loud (as in, top of your lungs loud) female voice boomed out through the complex. “Who is the f*#k-head illegally parked in front of my garage? Move your goddamn car right now.”

It scared both of us and, honestly, I was a bit fearful to go down and face the voice, so I stood on the stairs and hesitantly said, “Excuse me?” to which she immediately fired back, “Move your goddamn car right now, a#*hole.”

I am amazed I actually remained somewhat calm, because I have a tendency to go a bit ghetto in these kinds of situations. People like this can be a trigger to the days of feeling powerless — it is something I am still working on. I was fascinated that someone could, and would, be so offensive and rude, without even knowing what she was dealing with on the other side. For all she knew, I was a big, burly man with a weapon or an attitude.

Upon seeing her, I realized why she doesn’t hold back: she herself is a huge, surly woman with a hideous attitude that makes her seem well beyond her size.

My daughter and I nervously laughed, and then I apologized saying, “Sorry to inconvenience you, but I was only here for a minute,” to which she screamed in her loud, shouty way, “That’s a f*#king minute too long out of my life. Get your car out of my f*#king driveway you dumbass.” I am not making this up and this is not even all of the dialogue in the exchange. Her mouth runneth over, filling the alley with a cacophony of foul language.

Then it happened. My ghetto mouth got the better of me. I stooped to her level and threw out a few nasty comments of my own. She could not have cared less, which made me wish I had kept my mouth shut.

As she got in her car she threw me a dirty look and yelled, “Welcome to the neighborhood, DUMBASS.”

After she left, my daughter burst into hysterical laughter. “Oh my god, what just happened?” she said through her fits of giggles. We sat in the car belly laughing, the way you do when your system is completely shocked by something outrageous and needs to discharge the energy.

Yet again, the encounter made me realize the importance of healing our wounds so we are not living from a place of hateful anger and spewing it out all over the world. I can only hope the woman isn’t a teacher, doesn’t have children and will one day find her way to a better way of living.

Fortunately we found the humor. A memorable experience indelibly stamped on her twenty-first birthday, it provided a great springboard for deep conversation about the mysterious nature of human beings.

Sending you healing superpowers and love,

-db

 

Who is Dianna Bonny?

Hi, my name is Dianna Bonny. It’s my mission to candidly share my journey with you. For me, it’s all about the healing: to create a radiant healing energy for others who have befallen a similar fate. Together, we can forge beautiful lives of belonging and connection. Thanks for joining me today! I look forward to hearing from you.

  2 comments for “Unfortunate Encounters with Angry People

  1. Penny
    October 13, 2014 at 11:04 am

    Thanks for the laugh. Your daughter is blessed to have the wisdom, at 21 to CHOOSE TO RESPOND from the “lighter side”. Maybe she saw YOU and has KNOWN YOU longer than you have. We can run and we can hide but DAMN! its an exhausting journey. GOOD JOB MOM!

    PS. I have to wonder. If “Queen Mean of Parking Enforcement” measures her life by the minute you stole from her, what lessons might y’all have for each other? You may have a new friend.

    • Dianna Bonny
      October 13, 2014 at 11:42 am

      Love this Penny! Thank you for the smile. I’m quite sure we would have lessons for each other and I’m sure she has a story to share. Maybe one day our paths will cross again, though under less hostile circumstances, and I can explore the wisdom she has to offer. Appreciate your comment. xo

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