Happy New Year! This post is from a while back but in the spirit of ushering new energy in for the new year I thought it was a good one to share again. Next week I will be back on track with new thoughts and ideas for healing in 2015.

At coffee the other day, my friend and I were discussing the idea of letting go. It was one of those stream of consciousness conversations that we seem to have all the time. Do you have them? The ones that start out on one topic and then hop scotch all over in a random way that all knits together and seems to make perfect sense? I’m certain if someone overheard us they would have been confused.

We went from discussing her son to her Toastmaster’s speech to selling items on Ebay to the value of value to Eben Alexander’s new book to shame to my escrow and moving and then, finally, to letting go (only a run-on sentence could capture the essence!). I think we even briefly covered the unattainability of items on Gweneth Paltrow’s rather overreaching Goop site.

The zig-zag path into letting go went like this: my friend had given a lovely speech that morning on the meaning of value. She happens to be an expert at finding incredible deals on valuable items and knows how to shop Ebay in a blow-your-socks-off way. I, on the other hand, am truly pathetic at that sort of thing.

She can also rock a consignment store like no one’s business. For example, my daughter is going to cosmetology school and needed an arsenal of black clothes, so my friend offered to help. Off we went one day to see what we could find. At American Apparel we encountered a disappointing, and surprisingly expensive, selection. For four items we would have spent about $130. When you factor the equation of beauty school bleach + black fabric, this makes no sense.

Around the corner, we entered a second hand shop and as I was fumbling around the racks, she dropped into search and gather mode and, within 20 minutes, loads 22 items into my arms. The takeaway was 19 items for $200. Mostly new, all cool, and exactly what we needed. A shiny example extolling the meaning of value.

Pardon my digression.

We arrived at the idea of letting go because I mentioned that it’s a shame she wasn’t around when I moved out of the big house. I gave so much to consignment, and there is no doubt she would have had a field day. When we first went into escrow, my attitude was, “I am taking it all with me (add expletive here).” I ask her if she remembers Steve Martin in The Jerk, when he has lost everything and he’s walking around his house randomly grabbing items. That’s how I felt. It was just so hard to let go of things.

But, as we inched ever closer to the actual move, I had a monumental shift: it wasn’t going to be possible to bring it all. I had to let go. Very quickly, my take-it-all pendulum swung the other way and I began releasing a vast amount of material belongings.

It was very liberating. I mean, I didn’t hear angels singing or anything, but as the shackles of my material bondage loosened, I was flooded with a sense of freedom.

In the spirit of full disclosure, I will be honest that every now and again I lament letting go of certain things. All my tools and garden implements. And, oh, those gorgeous couches. Sigh.

Perhaps the shift from“I’ll be damned, I’m taking it all with me” to walking away was this: my consciousness knew the only way to go forward was to let go of the material connections to the past, and that one day, when my rational mind caught up, it would all make sense.

In the brilliant words of Albert Einstein:

“I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be.”

It has taken me nearly three years to really understand what he meant by this, but I think it had a lot to do with what happened.

Don’t you love it when your higher self is behind the scenes, working on your behalf, while your unaware self is out there blindly conducting your affairs, completely unaware?

I have so much gratitude for that higher self these days.

Have you had to let go of something in life that ultimately gave you more freedom?

-db

Who is Dianna Bonny?

Hi, my name is Dianna Bonny. It’s my mission to candidly share my journey with you. For me, it’s all about the healing: to create a radiant healing energy for others who have befallen a similar fate. Together, we can forge beautiful lives of belonging and connection. Thanks for joining me today! I look forward to hearing from you.